Monday, June 30, 2008

I am Bridget Jones.

Over the last week or so, I've had this monster cold-flu like thing. The fevers and the chills, the coughing, the headaches. . . nasty nasty nasty. I'm all better now, but let's talk about the lack of sleep. I still can't sleep and here is why.

I AM THINKING MYSELF TO INSANITY. I dream a lot- about a lot of things. But lately, the theme of my dreams just happens to be every boy I've ever dated before. And remember the dream about Siu and my little girl? Yeah, I've had that one twice since Friday. And Andrew. . . and needless to say Kyle. Ugh, I can't take it anymore! I want to sleep- so badly that I am considering buying a bottle of nyquil for that purpose only.

Of course I prayed about all of this foolishness, and do you know what my answer is? Last night, my hot home teacher came up to me after choir, and he sat next to me on the piano bench, put his arm around me and looked at me. Now, this is a very friendly thing to do, and he's a very friendly guy. I guess I'm just trying to say that he's my friend. But of course he makes my heart go crazy. So he invites me to this 4th of July thing. It's not a date. And he could have any girl he wanted I'm sure. So I am not being silly about this, but realistically, I have a very big problem. He gets so close and so McDreamy like. And he sits there, and looks at me. And HE WON'T STOP!! I have this face that I make when I'm scared. My eyes pop out of my head, and my chin drops lower, and it's like I can't blink. So last night, when he was sitting there and looking at me (no doubt waiting for me to say something) I just sit there and fidget. And then I giggle. And heaven forbid I snort. Anyway, my point is: This is a disaster. I am pretty sure this is the Lord's way of saying, "Here, think about someone new for a bit" And I'm very grateful, but why can't I just act normal? Friday night, I am going with a friend to his little get-together and I need to able to be cute and classy, and to actually speak. And when I am around him, I don't remember how to do that. So for any of you who are reading this, on this 4th of July, when you're all with ones you love watching fireworks and putting your hand over your heart, say a little prayer that Sarah isn't putting her foot in her mouth.

5 comments:

Kelly said...

Ah, Sarah. I hear you with thinking yourself to death & driving yourself crazy... Especially when that boy comes along that naturally steals your heart in seconds and gives you butterflies just thinking about him. What is it about men that make even the most composed girl fall apart when he's in her presence or thoughts... Sheesh. Sometimes I wish my brain had a switch so I could flip it off. :) But I'm sure you'll be as classy and cute as ever this weekend, no worries there!

sarahbrowniz said...

Aw, you are the sweetest! So, how bout lunch? What does July look like for you? Or maybe dinner.

random thoughts said...

oh Sarah, tonight you may have peed your pants. Dave Toronto (tall skinny dude, who's dating Melissa, who rode with us to the Scottish fest and wore the goggles..) know who I am talking about?... anyway he had waaaayyy too much caffeine, and being the good friend that I am, I suggested he do a sing-along/lip synch/ dance to a Mariah Carey song. And did he EVER deliver. Anyway, he did it to that one,and a Celion Dion Song. MY GOSH.....
The point is, no matter what you do,you will never make as big of a fool of yourself as this dude did. I love you, and I am sure this weekend will go swimmingly, if not, Shall be ready with ice cream and brownies... and a Frank Sinatra movie.

Elise said...

OH man! I was the worst at staying up all night analyzing things! I would try listening to music, but then that just ended up being the background music to our romantic date or something!

Kelly said...

Sarah you're so great! Thanks for all the comments on my blog :) And we definitely need to have a meal together. Whether it be breakfast, brunch, snack, supper, or dinner... this is a must. But hey, if you're moving down soon, that'll mean much more play time, right?? Eeek! So July's a little busy for me, but what's your schedule like?